As the new year slowly creeps in, make sure you’re ready by destroying your insecurities so you can take on 2019!
Insecurity is perhaps the biggest roadblock to achieving your goals. If you lack confidence and certainty in yourself and your skills, you’ll never leave the starting line.
Insecurity is the result of poor mental habits and giving too much power to others. With work, you can be a highly confident and secure person!
What causes insecurity? Babies aren’t insecure, so it must be something you’ve learned over the course of your lifetime. How do we become insecure and how to we maintain insecurity into adulthood?
There Are Several Causes of Insecurities:
- A lack of self-esteem. If you view yourself negatively and believe that you’re incapable, its inevitable that you’re going to feel insecure. The amount of self-esteem you have is ultimately up to you. No one else can decide it for you. However, if you let them, they most certainly can influence your self-esteem.
- Relying on others to make you feel good. Approval from others is nice, but when you need it to feel confident and secure, your feelings of self-worth are out of your control. This creates a strong need for approval and gives too much power to everyone around you. Don’t give your power away!
- Unreasonable expectations. The people that are held up in our society and on social media. These are the people that we see in the movies and magazines. These are the people that show up in our scroll down social media. It’s easy to forget that they’re a very tiny portion of the population. Avoid comparing yourself to them and others you see.
- Insults and criticisms from the past. These negative comments may have come from parents, teachers, peers, or anyone else from your past. Children are especially sensitive to criticism and may have a hard time moving past negative comments.
Few people feel as secure as they would like. Your feelings about yourself and the world rarely change without mindset work and focus. If you can change your mindset, you can change your world. Make the decision to let go of your unreasonable expectations and your past hurts so you can take on 2019. The future is waiting for you, so you cab take on 2019.
Try these strategies to feel more secure in yourself so you can take on 2019 on your own terms:
- Approve of yourself. Practice Self-Acceptance. Give yourself a compliment more often then not. When you notice your hoping for approval from someone else, stop and give yourself approval. Its nice to receive compliments from others from time to time. However, when we are hoping for it more than not, we need to look within to see what we are truly after. With time, your interest in receiving approval from others will fade.
- Only compare yourself to yourself. Are you in better shape than you were last month? Is your financial situation improving? Are you experiencing gains in your social life? Seek improvement over your past. Avoid worrying about what everyone else is doing. Focus on doing you! Think of a race horse. They run with blinders on and don’t know what the other is doing. They focus on running their race. There is only one of you in the world, be the best you that you can be.
- Let go of the past. Think of the times you’ve been unkind or critical toward others. Does it seem reasonable for someone to still feel wounded by the comments you made so many years ago? Your comments weren’t relevant, and neither were the comments anyone made to you. Forgive everyone from your past, forgive yourself and enjoy today so you can take on 2019 with gusto!
Feeling secure is about removing the power you allow others to have over you. You don’t need the approval of others. You don’t need to compare yourself to others. The past doesn’t have to define you today.
Identify the challenges that are creating feelings of insecurity in your life and face them head-on. You can be more accepting of yourself and trust yourself more than you do today.
As an added bonus, the better you feel about yourself, the better you’ll feel about others too. Refuse to allow any insecurity to tarnish your future and your new year. Make the decision today to trust and love the person you are more and more each day.